Even if you’ll later say that you saw it coming, nearly all breakups catch us off-guard. When that heart-wrenching moment happens to you it’s time to start looking forward, put the past in the past, and process through the pain. Personally, I thrive off of taking a step back and looking at the relationship and breakup from a place of logic, instead of emotion.
Here are a few things you may not expect, that can be extremely helpful as you work through a breakup:
He’s not interested anymore.
Why waste your time and energy on someone who doesn’t want you? The number one quality to look for in a partner in their love of you and their appreciation for all the wonderful things you are. They don’t see it? Don’t waste your time.
He didn’t know you.
Maybe he knew your favorite color or cocktail of choice, but he didn’t deeply, truly know and understand you. If he had the capacity to know and truly know you, he wouldn’t leave. A person that can understand all the nooks and crannies of who you are will want to stay.
If he’s “too busy” or has “too much going on” right now for a relationship.
He can’t meet your needs. If he doesn’t have “time” for you what he means is he doesn’t want to have time for your needs. If he’s listing off a ton of reasons why the two of you can’t be together all he’s doing is crafting his cop-out argument. If you’re “too much” or moving “too fast” it means he’s someone who can’t keep up.
He set you free.
It’s simple. He released you from a relationship with someone who couldn’t give you everything that you deserve and desire. You have so much freedom in being a “me” instead of a “we”. Embrace it.